Fourth July Selection, 2012

There has to be something under this
I can feel it.
The way I became obsessed with forgiveness
the theology of it
after that night.


I thought that in forgiving
rushing there
I might get back to the ground
that unground


To God
Who I needed
and thought I could find
on that mountain

He choked me
with arms that read
Om Mani Padme Hum

We were buying our enlightenment

Your level 5 beat my 1  

I stopped climbing 

I came down the mountain

looking for the home 

where we lived before the words

and the prayers

and the spiritual tattoos

the mistakes that lost us

So

Whatever is underneath,

I know that

it is not the ink 

that makes the book holy

and mountains are just piles of dirt

that go up and down

and that you will forgive

me 

when I stand in the pulpit

boldly preaching the wrong directions

Just like you forgave us all 

the minute we left. 

--“Rachel”